Dude

This post was prompted by my visit to BP this afternoon. Two men were standing outside their car chatting loudly and this other chick and I were pumping our gas nearby. Idiot #1 says to Idiot #2 "Ask her if that's a keg in her pants?" Idiot #2 "Why?" Idiot #1 "Cause I'd like to tap that ass!" I don't know which one of us they were talking about - nor do I care. It just goes to further the truth that women are the superior species. I don't hear my girlfriends using lines like this (maybe in the car for fun or in one another's ears, but never to an actual man's face).
Why oh why must men use this type of cheesy verbage? At least come up with something weird or spicy that I can respect you for.
So just for future reference - using the following lines will not help you at getting in my pants:
"I'd like to hit that."
"That shirt looks really nice on you. It would look even better crumpled up on my floor."
"You like Pop Tarts? Cause that's what we're having for breakfast tomorrow."
"Hi, my name is ...... Now remember that because you'll be screaming it later."
"What's a sexy woman like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?"
"Do you work for UPS? Because I could swear I saw you looking at my package."
"Sorry, I thought that was a braille nametag."

The only man that was ever successful with using a line on me was in 97 in a college bar. He said "Nice shoes. Wanna fuck?" Noticing my excellent taste in footwear? That's someone I could talk to for hours. Ladies...Jorge...anyone...tell me your favorite lines.