Craig's List - Can You Really Find Everything?

It's been said that people hook-up with everything from prom dates to lawn mowers on this site, but can you really find everything your heart desires? Please read my new add and let me know what you think before I submit it this week. It started in jest, but I really think I've got something here.

There's something missing in my life, and since long ago I decided I'm way too selfish to have children, the only way to fill this gap I've decided is with a new gay boyfriend. See I was one of those girls growing up who had a lot of guy friends between the ages of 10 to 15 only for them all to discover at 17 that they were indeed gay. For some reason the Madonna obsessions never really gave them away, but times were simpler then. In my 30s now I've had fleeting gay boyfriends but I can't tell you when my last night at Manhole was or when anyone actually got behind me on a theme party idea.

Here's the deal, if you'll be my next gay boyfriend, we can shop, sit around and watch awards shows/pageants, you can bitch about your boyfriend/husband/lack thereof, I can bitch about my husband (who will always think we are plotting against him anyway), we'll of course go shopping and for spa days, go dancing at over-priced clubs (with VIP rooms), paint by numbers, overindulge on champagne cocktails and white zinfandel, throw impromptu dance parties, learn more about cheese and teach each other French (unless you already know French, then you can teach me). We'll also plan fabulous exotic vacations which will never happen, and drunk dial our senator. Get the idea?

About me, just turned 30, married, a lot of evenings on my hands to drink martinis and have both intelligent and entirely catty conversations at the same time, cute with great looking girlfriends, good with snappy comebacks, penchant for coveted classics like pearls or a Hermes Kelly bag, hater of gauchos and straight men who wear sandals, fervent reader of American/ Italian Vogue, lover of Grey Gardens, Mean Girls, the color pink, and music - From Cat Stevens to Ludacris, seriously I love a lot of music.

You must be "close" to my age, not have a crush on my husband, appreciator of the classics "Sybil, Mommie Dearest, What Ever Happened to Baby Jane..etc." love of indie/foreign film and music would be nice, loving Project Runway a bonus, must make GREAT martini, militant Democrat, can tell me when I'm over accessorizing, must love animals, a good Phyllis Diller impersonation would also be nice. Let's meet for $11.00 drinks and I’ll introduce you to my other fag-hag girlfriends.